I'm an Asshole of a Roommate (but at least I know it)

Me: asher left out his popems
Me: and Im eating all of them
Me: and claytons out of town
Me: so I cant blame him
Rachel: haha aww
Rachel: blame the dog
Me: we dont have a dog
Me: we should get one for this exact purpose
Rachel: haha I was kidding, but getting a dog is always a good idea
Me: it would come in so handy in this sort of situation
Me: I could just drop the box on the floor when Im done
Me: and asher would catch the dog licking it
Me: and I would be in the clear
Rachel: haha
Rachel: that's a lovely visual
Rachel: you should be a writer!
Me: I KNOW